Alternate title: Tension
Tonight was the last practice before my team’s first tournament of the season. And it got me thinking. The players get a release. They get to play the games. They get the physical. The coaches get the stress. Did I do all I could to prepare my players? Did I remember everything to take along for the out of town trip? Was my speech brilliant enough? Am I prepared?
When I played, I wasn’t afraid of anyone. I didn’t care how much better a player was than me, I was never afraid. I knew I could always foul them or get into them somehow. I was *that* player. I could control that somehow. But coaching is different. I am not in control. All of my abilities are represented in someone (abstractly) that I have no true control over. No matter how many times we work on a behavior, that player will either do the behavior correctly or not.
The other thing is that I am kind of on my own to a certain extent. I am in a unique situation. Most clubs do not have a dedicated goalkeeper coach. And goalkeeper coaches are usually part of a set up. I have the head coach that I answer to and … the parents? I have no mentors while I am doing this. I am my own expert to lean on. Nothing like jumping in to learn how to swim. I have some connections but feel so out of my depth because of where they are versus where I am in our respective careers. I feel awkward asking advice from professionals for an amateur boys team.
I think the boys will do well. If they stay focused, remember what we went over in practice, we should be able to hold our own. I like either of our keepers in any of the games. I usually enjoy these trips and am looking forward to it.